Friday, May 1, 2009

FYP Says Caracals Just Have To Be Different

In Response to Caracals Just Have To Be Different

Fuck you, Fuck You, Penguin! I mean, dude! C'mon, why you hatin'? What's wrong with being different? I don't dig fascism, and your close-mindedness is suffocating my good mood.

Why will you only accept two kinds of ears for the feline kind? And why are you OK with one that is a scientific aberration? You heard me, the "folded ears" that you cite, are in fact a mutation. I quote the official breed page of the Scottish Fold cat from the Cat Fanciers' Association Web site:

"Scottish Folds come in two types: folded ear and straight (normal) ear. The folded ear is produced by an incomplete dominant gene and is the result of a spontaneous mutation."

That's right, them pussies is mutants! And you have the nerve to pick on me, Fuck You, Penguin? Well, fuck you!

Damn! I need my ears to hear shit. You try listening for small prey on a hunt in the wild with elephants trumpeting and stampeding, and hyenas cackling their asses off like fools. It is damn near impossible to hear the scurry of a rodent or rabbit with regular ol' cat ears--I know, 'cause my cousin Coco, a Manx cat who lives with the Snyders, a nice human family, in Terre Haute, came to see me last year and he couldn't hear a fuckin' thing.

Next thing you're gonna claim, you fascist, is that cats can only have two kinds of tails: regular and bobbed. And boy howdy, will you be sorry then, bub, 'cause Coco ain't got none. That's right, Manx cats ain't got no tails. And Coco is one mean mother fucker--when you ain't got no tail, you get mean.

Tread softly, Fuck You, Penguin! Tread softly.

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